Are you experiencing fitflation?
If it seems like the gay section of your closet has grown larger, you’re not imagining it. Where office appropriate attire once stood, shelves and hangers are now dominated by leopard print, dangling crystal earrings, quippy tanks, and those cute little five inch shorts that hug your bubble butt so well you bought them in every. goddamn. color. Thank goodness for Shein and Etsy. Being gay is expensive, ya’ll.
So, how does one discern which party is worth the investment? Look no further than the Gay Agenda Events Standard (GAES), pronounced like “Gays”..obvi (copyright pending).
There are four criteria:
Is it an inclusive, diverse party that you can feel comfortable being you?
Is there a fabulous theme that gets you excited to get creative with your lewk?
Is the entertainment high-quality, providing a unique experience?
How well-organized are the logistics (ticketing, space planning, wait times, etc)?
After attending last month’s Pride party, Gay Agenda SF is pleased to announce that in less than six months, Gemini the club has ‘topped’ the GAES (and we are going to keep coming back for more, darling). For more information on the founding of this party, check out this SFist article, but here’s our experience:
Arriving to Holy Cow, situated on Folsom Street, the building itself is quiet and unassuming. Even at peak arrival, there was a short wait for ID, ticket, and coat check with friendly staff. The bar line was minimal. Sexy dancers above the bar distracted us from slightly pricey drink prices with a wink from above. We were off to a good start.
And then there was the crowd. You could see that all types of gays were there. Fitting to the theme of Pantone, there was a beautiful array of colors. Lewk queens led the way with corsets, elaborate custom harnesses, and even butterflies.
It was a vibe, but didn’t feel pretentious. Although, it was noticeable to us who didn’t receive the assignment at all (and I oop), you could wear a themed tank and shorts to fit right in. When we caught up with the organizers, they told us that they approach the event as “more of a brief than a theme”. Their goal “[is] to create an easy achievable outfit for the average attendee, and a space for the creatives to truly shine; everyone coming together to create a cohesive collection”. Themes are generally selected by the founders, but they are open to ideas and collaborations. Just send them a message on Instagram.
The music, which was a combination of banger remixes, disco, and house maintained a full dancefloor the whole time. In the background, though, you could see folks meeting each other in the seated spaces or outside in the sun-lit patio. We loved seeing folks getting flirty, making out, and feelin’ themselves. That’s how it should be.
Overall, what we loved about this party was that it just felt like good vibes. The organizers have quickly achieved their goal to provide something special to do than simply going to Dolo for Saturday daytime. It gives you the familiar feel and comfort of a bestie’s birthday, while completely elevated.
For these reasons, Gay Agenda SF picks Gemini as one of its July favorites. We hope they keep up the good work.
The next party is this Saturday, July 16 at 2pm, and the brief is Summer Camp. Tracks will be spun by the legendary DJ Brian & Kelly Naughton (DAD). So, get ready to raise some tents and get sticky with s’more not so mellow fun. (You can purchase tickets here for $20 + fees and there is a BIPOC/Trans discount).
And as always, remember, that consent is sexy and no fboy is worth your time.
XOXO, Baron Whistlebottom
Gay Agenda SF
FYI - Gay Agenda SF is not affiliated with nor has it received compensation for promoting this event.